A632.9.3.RB – Role of Emotion in Decision Making

Hoch & Kunreuther (2005), claimed that there is growing proof of evidence confirming how emotions play a significant role in our decision-making process most especially when there are inconsistent outcomes.  According to Shiv (2011), it is of utmost importance to invoke emotion to develop our decision confidence.  He further stated that with decision confidence comes with a passion that is very persuasive, where our confidence is contagious, and most importantly, the emotion that emerges from our decision has a huge impact in the extraction of the utility from our experience.  It has a direct bearing on our motivation and engagement in the successful performance of our critical tasks.

Personally, my decision-making has always been tied to my personal values.  I have always believed that everybody deserves to be extended the benefit of the doubt.  So, when someone says hurtful things to me or treat me unfairly, my first instinct is the person must be experiencing some personal issue and is not thinking right.  Some may think that I am just too naïve to see or accept the reality that the individual just plainly does not like me.  For me, I have made a decision always to give someone the benefit of the doubt and be forgiving, regardless. 

            As the Lay Director for an annual retreat at our parish church, I encountered problems and issues that required highly emotional stability.  Leading and maintaining peace within 21 diverse and very talented women was a challenge.  Before the actual retreat, we met 3 hours once a week, trying to know each other by engaging each other, strengthening our faith, and learn to witness for Christ in front of future 30 women retreaters.  Although we meet once a week, there was no day that I get contacted by one of the women giving me their individual thoughts about the meeting, what they heard about other members thought about my leadership, in short, I became the gossip disposal. 

I knew that conflict was inevitable from the beginning.  I have tried to minimize if not eliminate possible conflicts within the group by trying to make sure that those gossips end with me.  But with a full-time job that required my 24-hour commitment, the responsibility of maintaining peace and collaborative teamwork was emotionally and spiritually exhausting.  The purpose of my acceptance to be the Lay Director, was one, to be spiritually stronger, and two, to positively influence members of my team to do the same so as together, we strengthen our faith and be an excellent example to our parishioners and the community.

With lots of prayers and contemplation, I discovered that in a way, I was part of the problem why the negativism within the group continued.  Instead of telling the team my honest opinion about gossips, all I did was listen and never actually made an effort to tell them that we need to try to see things from the other team member’s perspective and everyone deserved the benefit of the doubt.  I was too weak and embarrassed, to be honest to myself and to the members of my team that I did not have all the answers and the capacity to be spiritually and emotionally strong to carry everyone’s load.

Knowing what I knew then about my mistake, I asked to meet with our Spiritual Director (our Parish Priest), to meet with me one on one.  I confided about what has been happening outside the meeting and where I was emotionally and spiritually.  He asked me if I have a resolution in mind to control the ongoing gossips if not to stop it fully.  I told him that I needed his support by being present to call in an emergency meeting with the team where I can apologize for being a part of the problem instead of being a part of the solution. 

During the meeting, I was confident that my team will see things through the I saw things, and I was emotional stable since I have the support of our Spiritual Director. I told the team that the purpose of the emergency meeting was so I can apologize for failing them as their Lay Director.  I was not being honest myself and to them by not voicing out my thoughts and concerns for the success of our team, but moving forward, I will be better.  To my surprise, every single member of the team spoke up and did the same thing.  The rest of the weekly meetings and the two-day retreat spent with a total of fifty women were very encouraging and emotionally and spiritually fulfilling.  Our team became family, and we continued to keep in touch by having a once a month luncheon whenever time permits for everyone.  I was very confident that with my decision to honestly speak out with my team would result in a positive outcome.

I was once faced with a difficult situation where I was asked by a Dean of Graduate Studies to place an employee on notice of termination due to insubordination and poor performance.  The first thing I asked was if the Dean has documentation to support his decision to terminate the employee.  He said that he has not so I have advised him to write all incidences to justify and prove the insubordination and poor performance.  The employee has just passed his 90-day probationary period as a new employee, and the Dean noted on the employee’s 90-day new hire performance evaluation of the need for improvements.

            When I received Dean’s documentation to justify the release of the employee, instead of consulting with the University’s Legal Counsel first, I asked the VP of Academic Affairs who supported Dean’s decision to terminate.  Although I was not very confident of the VP’s decision and my instinct was telling me not to do it, I went ahead implemented the decision to end the employment of the employee.  The employee was just married and just relocated to the area.  He was beyond himself when I delivered the message.  I was filled with anxiety and was emotionally exhausted after my meeting with the employee and literally found myself crying after he left.

            My decision to go along with the Dean of Graduate Studies and the VP of Academic Affairs was based on a confirmation biased and was not based on documented facts.  I have learned a great deal from that incident.  As a human resources professional, I found that I needed to strengthen my investigative skills so I can make a confident decision that would resolve the issue or problem.  I learned to develop self-awareness and learned to listen to what my instinct tells me before reacting or making a decision.

Reference:

Hoch, S. J., & Kunreuther, H. C. (2005). Wharton on making decisions. (1st edition.).

Hoboken, NJ: John Wiley & Sons Inc.

Shiv, B. (2011). Brain Research at Standard: Decision Making.  Retrieved from: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WRKfl4owWKc